Still, small voice & my will

It's funny how you can stop doing something ONCE, with every intention of returning...and then a second time you don't do it, for a good reason...and the 3rd or 4th time in a row you don't do it...next time, you CAN'T do it...

I had every intention of doing something, and I was getting ready to do it...but I just couldn't... I had been feeling neutral about it all day, and right when I was getting ready, I heard that still, small voice... saying I didn't need to do it... and my intellectual side was confused by that...so I asked for clear confirmation.

Well...as I was reaching the point where I needed to make the decision or run out of time...I began feeling sick and anxious...and clammy... this has never happened to me...at least not for something I thought was good... the more I thought about doing this thing, the more sick I felt...until I just said, "Ok, I'm not doing it!"

In the past I would have felt compelled to do this thing, and guilty if I didn't want to do it. But not in this current season. It is a strange feeling knowing that something that used to be a big part of your life...is not so important in this season... not that it isn't important! Just not for me... for now... 

Friends...reason, season or lifetime

Today I bumped into 2 old friends in the same centre. One was excited to see me - and I her! The other only warranted a respectful hello, and nothing more. Isn't it funny how people change.

One friend organised a catch up (because I was working at the time), and the other was simply 'there'.

All my life I have seen the relevance of the concept that

FRIENDS are for
a reason;
a season;
or a lifetime.  

During the last 2 years I have seen this so clearly....and sometimes it has been quite sad to let friends go. But when you remember this concept, it is much easier to accept the changes.
Sometimes you don't want to let friends go, but trying to keep them seems to take up more emotional energy than God expects of us. That's when you need to let them go. When the emotional drain and strain are not worth the results you receive. When you know you've tried, but it seems nothing will change unless the other person also tries. So you need to let them go. It's also true of the quote: "If you love something/somebody let them go". It's not easy...but sometimes it's all you can do. Sometimes they return...others times they do not. They are the reason and seasonal friends. While the reason or season was ripe, the friendship was too. But once the reason or season came to an end...you had the accept the inevitable....and let them go.

Sometimes I wonder whether we are to let friends go because we need to make room for new ones...for new seasons in our lives... other times I can see that friends who I truly valued, were only in my life for a short time. Not because they were bad people, but their purpose in my life, and mine in theirs was no longer required. Unfortunately, sometimes these friends have become 'dark' and tried to put black in my rainbows...but God designed the rainbows - and helped me to remove the black, or removed the black himself.

I must admit that some of the blackest ones have previously been some of the brightest colours. But they were only seasonal friends... there is no longer a place in my rainbow for them. But that is ok. I understand the reasons. Sometimes it hurts to let friends go... but it is the only option.

Sometimes friends who never really left, but drifted away... return when you least expect!

I need to remind myself of the good times with some old friends. The enemy loves to try to cause rifts and hurts, but when you remember God's purposes, you know everything works together for good (Rom 8:28).

Having said that, I'm looking forward to catching up with my old friend again :)

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Joel 2:25

“I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten—    the great locust and the young locust,    the other locusts and the locust swarm—my great army that I sent among you". (Joel 2:25. NIV)

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T.D. Jakes

I had a day off today... I enjoyed staying home and getting into some de-cluttering...a daunting task for a girl who attracts organised chaos! But I am proud of myself for what I managed to get done :)

So, I sat down this morning with a cup of tea, and started listening to T.D. Jakes...from a link on my Facebook page. It was awesome...I found myself feeling quite sad when the message finished...I was hungry for More!

Often when my husband has a Rostered Day Off work, I come home from work to see him spending time with Mr Jakes. It's encouraging to see your loved one getting spiritually fed by somebody as deep as Mr Jakes. It encourages me to keep growing too :)

So today was my turn. It was soooo good... I ended up playing about 3 different messages (loud! lol!) while cleaning around the house. I really enjoyed being 'stuck' at home today. You can't STOP long enough to really get into these things when you've been working all day. Today my mind was fresh, and my spirit ready.

During this season I am currently in, T.D. Jakes and other ministers have been encouraging me and helping me push through...I often feel alone...but I have some wonderful people in my life who help me change that feeling. This morning, there was POWER in my house! It was just awesome!!!

Here are a few quotes I loved...

You always know God has an assignment for you when the enemy sends an assassin to destroy you.

God will use Rejection to give you Direction

God is going to take you to some place you've never been, to show you something you've never seen, so that you can do something you've never done! 

No deviations, no discrepancies - just direction. That's what you want for this year of your life. Deviation: Don't sidetrack me! Discrepancy: Don't try to pull me down into confusion and chaos. I just want Direction for my life! 

I just love T.D. Jakes... He brings joy to my spirit and life into my soul!
Hallelujah!!!!!!